Saddest Story
The Fear Of Love Part 1
| Continue to The Fear Of Love
Part 1 | 2 |
During my freshman year in high school, I met a young
man by the name of Chang Yang. I didn't get to know him
from school. I met him at a friend's birthday party. He
was sixteen years old and I was fourteen years old. We
were young and immature.
I saw him as he was walking through the front door with
his friends to the party. They were nice looking and it
seemed fun to know them. I spotted him as he had a great
smile on his face and was attractive. Initially, I was
reluctant to approach him but I summoned my courage and
asked him for his name. We got to know each other and
hung out together throughout the birthday party.
Through our conversations, I found out that we had a
lot in common and we also shared the same interests. At
the end of the party, we exchanged phone numbers. The
following day, he called me and we talked for hours. I
fell in love with his sweet and beautiful voice instantly.
We continued conversing over the phone for about four
months before deciding to meet up for a date. We arranged
to meet at the park near the river.
After meeting up, we talked endlessly for what seemed
like hours until we had nothing more to say. We sat in
silence and stared at the water. I still remember the
scenario as if it was yesterday as he took my hand and
looked me in the eyes and asked me if I would be willing
to give my heart to him. I was completely stunned at the
question. I knew I love him and wanted to be with him
but I was too young to understand love and I felt that
I'm not ready for love yet.
Hence, I said honestly, "I'm not ready."
His face of happiness turned to sadness and he stopped
talking. He dropped my hand from his and walked away from
me. I didn't know what to do so I followed him and joked
about us.
I told him, "There’s nothing to lose if you
don't receive love back from the one person you love.”
Gosh! I was so stupid. He never called me back and neither
did I. I felt that I did nothing wrong because I told
him what I thought and felt.
Days passed. The days turned into weeks and the weeks
into months. It was a year later when I next saw him again
at the Hmong New Year in Fresno. I was a sophomore that
year. I went up to him and greeted him. He said hi and
smiled back. I didn't know if he forgave me for what happened
a year ago but he asked me to take a walk with him. As
we walked, we started chatting about the past. He talked
about his senior year in high school and I talked about
mine. The day went by quickly even though it seemed like
I only spent a couple of hours with him. I couldn't believe
how fast the time passed and that he's finally talking
to me again. At the end of it, we hugged and bade each
other goodbye. He told me that he will be leaving Fresno
for San Jose the following day as he had moved to San
Jose in the past year. I was disappointed and sad that
I won't be able to see him. He promised to call me and
we communicated mainly through phone calls.
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